Brazil - March 2009

This visit to the Heart of the Initiate Workshop in Brazil was not a usual workshop week. There were to be three Ayahuasca ceremonies and that was all. None of the other workshop activities were to take place, no sharings, no lectures, no Lakota Indian ceremonies and no opening or closing circle ceremonies.

This had a definite impact on the week as I will explain later and I was with the usual tribe with whom I had drank Ayahuasca before

First Journey - The Female of the Species

It took a while for anything to happen on my first journey as there was no 'white noise' no feeling of nausea or rumblings in the tummy. I closed my eyes and lay down on my mat waiting for my journey to begin. Some people had only drank a little, some the normal amount the Shaman gives you and others as much as they liked! However, I did get the feeling that some were not enthusiastic about drinking Ayahuasca for their own reasons.

The Shaman was playing his music and singing, I listened to the Shaman for a while and after what seemed like an age I found myself in a bright green jungle with trees and brightly coloured flowers all around, reds, yellows, blues etc. The grass was so lush and green. A lioness came right up to my face and she was beautiful, yet I sensed her power. She looked into my eyes, turned and walked away. Next came a black female jaguar, her green eyes stared into mine as she too walked away. I then saw in succession an owl, a turtle and a monkey. The lioness kept returning to me.

All female
All mothers

I looked down at the grass beneath me, all was quiet and a lady's hand came up from the grass with her fingers outstretched. She beckoned me to put my left hand to hers which I did. As soon as I had done this her fingers interlocked with mine and I felt her warmth.

Mother Earth

Next I was riding a white animal, I do not know what kind of animal it was just that it was furry and had little ears and a wide head. It was strong and powerful, and quite large as my legs were stretched out on her back. She took me towards a bright yellow light, as bright as the sun.

My next visions were of native American Indians which decided to appear on the roof of the cabana we were in. There were both male and female. The roof of the maloca then opened up like a trap door, first the right door then the left. I could now see all the stars and the night sky. Bright white lights appeared on the roof of the cabana. They were rod shaped and moving down the beams towards the corner where the Shaman was. If any of you have ever burned magnesium in chemistry class, you will understand how bright they were. I once into trouble at school for setting fire to a whole coil of the stuff which is how I remember it. I got detention for wasting the school's resources. I also used to hot up empty test tubes on the Bunsen Burner and put them back into the wooden racks as well. I got away with that for ages until one day Peter Gawkrodger spoilt it for me, and decide to faint in class holding two fingers up, as I was heating my latest weapon.

I gazed at the stars for ages and I could feel that the natives were still with me. I could feel their presence, although they did not speak to me. It was a very happy feeling and atmosphere. However, I was aware of the others who by now had come out of their journeys and I could hear them talking and walking around.

I saw my husband standing next to a drain which was half moon shaped and grey. He had his back to me wearing a beige jacket and a panama hat. The drain was to his left and a blue bottle with a hexagonal base was in the drain lying on its side. The bottom of the bottle was broken from the main part and the edges were all jagged. I sensed much sadness from this sight and saw tears.

I was also shown that the reason the lioness kept returning to me was because the lioness is the one who keeps the pride together, if she didn't the pride would not survive. The lioness is the most sociable of the big cats as she works within a team, whilst other female big cats work alone.

To me this was symbolic of the fact that our tribe must be kept together or we are not going to survive.

Sounds cheesy I know, but if something is shown to me, how the hell can I ignore it??

I staggered down to the cabana for something to eat and a drink and was met by some of the tribe sat in chairs looking very dismal. There was an air of disappointment as they had neither seen or heard anything on their journeys. I was wondering if it was because some of us had our minds on other things, did not want to drink or just something that was meant to be.

The day after, I asked the Shaman via his assistant who can speak English, why he thought some people had seen nothing. He replied that some had not drank enough to see anything, and some had not allowed the plant to do her job, but had rather questioned or held back from her.

I hoped the next ceremony would be different

Second Journey - Down the Rabbit Hole ??

I embarked on my second journey a lot quicker than the first. I was pinned down to my mat, and was shown a swirling vortex of bright colours. I kept asking questions such as 'What is this?' and 'What is that?' and 'Why do I have to see this?' I could sense that someone was getting a little irate with me and telling me not to ask so many questions but just 'Let go of yourself and we will take care of you'

That was a little funny because I had a conversation earlier in the day with one of the younger members of the tribe as he was having trouble with the 'letting go' thing, as he had received no visions on the first journey so I was asking him to try his best and he will journey. Now here was I, having the same problem myself.

As I was not paying attention a voice appeared that I did recognise. It was that of my friend and he told me, in a nice way, everything was going to be all right and, 'Now shut up and listen, nothing bad is going to happen to you, it's OK' I did as I was told.

After seeing numerous beautiful ladies of all races, I was taken to a lady who looked a bit like Cleopatra with the Egyptian style eye make up and hair but she had a green face. She held out her hand and a black hole opened up next to her. 'How deep do you want to go Susie?' she said. I was not frightened by this but something made me turn and walk away. On doing this I was met by some small demon like people who gently held my outstretched arms and led me back to the black hole. Down I went and I knew I was going to another world.

On reflection, it must have looked like that Spielberg film called Close Encounters, where the aliens take hold of the volunteers with outstretched arms and lead them into their space ship. Nice, but a scary type of nice.

I was put onto a table in darkness and something was put on my tongue which pressed it down into the floor of my mouth. The time for speaking had come to an end. A strange looking man was looking into my eyes, he had a large head, which looked like an upside down raindrop shape, and a dark green face. I just accepted this situation. It was uncomfortable but all the time I could see the faces of the rest of the tribe with me and I knew I was safe.

I felt a dull ache under my left breast, but nothing painful and I saw a clean vertical cut there in my mind. Something was gently dragged out. My lungs appeared before my eyes complete with trachea and a lady's hands were around them, she was moulding them and rubbing them slowly. It felt like I could not breathe at all but I was alive. All I could feel was the dull ache and my tongue being pressed down and my mouth so dry. I woke up after I was told I was 'OK now' and I was breathing very heavily. I lay down again as I felt so weak.

After a spell of staring at the roof thinking about what had just happened, there was the sound of grunting like some wild pig would make and I struggled to sit up, wondering what the hell was going on. The noise was so loud and was coming from the corner to my right of the cabana we were in. I heard this pig rustle through the bushes at the back of it, and noticed my friend was sitting up and kept turning his head to the right as though he too could hear it. I was going to go over to him and ask if he could hear what I was hearing but was too weak to do so. Besides he may have thought I was crazy. I even heard this pig foraging in the leaves on the ground.

The morning after, I was at the breakfast table and my friend asked if anyone had heard the pig last night. I had already told my husband I had heard this pig and I nearly fell off my chair with surprise, as we had both heard the exact same thing. My friend even mentioned it was at the back of him in the bushes. However, the strange thing was, no-one else had.

I mentioned this to the Shaman the day after and asked if he had heard the pig. He said he had not and neither had his assistant, but if it came again on the last ceremony I was to tell him. It didn't. He also said that there was a wild jungle pig in South American countries, but they are very rare to be seen next to tropical beaches which is where our cabana was!

The day after I felt like I was recovering from a medical operation. I was weak, sleepy, breathless and drained of all energy. It took ages to wear off. It felt like I was recovering from some major trauma, yet I was in no pain and felt peaceful.

I started to wonder if what had happened to me was a healing or a warning. Was it the case that there was something in my lungs that the plant had healed, or was it a wake up call to ditch my nicotine addiction?

Did she give me a new set of lungs as the old ones were knackered or did she show me the damage I was doing to myself?

Were lung transplants possible under Ayahuasca in another dimension?
Do you have to go there to get one?
How did my friend know it was OK?
Was he directed to take me there?

I was driving myself mad asking myself all these questions, but have decided to accept that what I saw and felt was real

Last Journey - Tears, Piers & The Jaguar Nears

So far I had interacted with fingers on a hand popping up from the earth, been up close and personal with a lioness, been visited by pigs in the night and sent down the rabbit hole to have bits taken out of me. Yet my last journey was the most powerful of all.

My journey started with me seeing lots of children of all races. I also saw mothers with children. I asked if I could see my children and a my friend who was across from me appeared in my vision. She was very beautiful and was wearing a white robe and an orange beaded necklace. She shone in the light. She said ' Of course Susie, here they are' She held out her hand and our two sons aged 25 and 21 appeared before me. They both said 'Hello Mum' and then it all went back to when they were babies, then toddlers then schoolboys. It was so emotional that I woke up crying. I could not stop myself, but as my tears fell heavily on my blanket I could hear Shamen singing in my ears. It was not our Shaman's voice as he was not sitting on his chair and his wife was sitting on the floor playing an instrument.

I lay down again thinking 'I will stop crying soon' and I did. It was like a wave of emotion came over me and I could not stop the tears from flowing, it was like I was crying for every mother on the earth. My friend was still around in my visions. I could see beautiful ladies' faces but their voices were that of my friend and she kept talking to me. At one point I sat up to see where she was and she was still across from me asleep on her mat. She was reassuring me all the time that everything was OK, and that my children loved me.

Next I was standing at the entrance of a swirling black hole. My husband was there wearing his familiar hat and beige jacket. I took his hand and asked what it was. He said he did not know. Suddenly the voice of my friend appeared again. It was the same friend who had reassured me that to go down the black hole last time was OK.

'Go through' he said, 'It's all right, it is only another dimension. I have been there before so I know it is OK' So we both walked through. There were little yellow lights on the sides and when we got to the end it was all dark yet we could see each other. 'What's he up to ?' My husband said.

'(His name) Where the f**k are we?'

Our friend's voice came from the darkness with a chuckle and said ' I told you it was OK'

I was now in a coffin. I lay there as the two doors banged shut above me. 'Not nice down here is it?' the demon said sat down next to me. He told me that this what we believed happened, put in a box and that was it .... It's not.

In my next vision the Jaguar came and he crawled up my body as I was laying on my mat. He disappeared into me and into my heart. I felt strong. I could feel him in between my feet under my blanket and he moved to my right side and laid down next to me. I woke up stroking my blanket! Yet I could still feel him near me.

Native North American Indians appeared in the cabana and they lined the walls all seated. They bowed forward and held out their hands. A chief held in his hand a string of coloured tobacco packets from the tobacco tying ceremony normally done at the workshop. He smiled at me and told me that I must tell the lady who did this with us 'Thank you' he also said he knew we did this ceremony. He then put the string of colours into my left hand, smiled and disappeared. I saw chiefs with animals on their head dresses such the buffalo and the eagle. The ordinary Indians took me by the hands and led me to a tribe where I saw where they lived, their fires, their dogs, warriors, women and children. Some were on horses and some were just sitting down.

I saw giant Indians sitting on chairs and I only came up to the chair leg. I gazed in awe at these people and they looked down at me. Big, large powerful men.

I found myself in a native South American Indian hut. I saw the thatched roof and they were carrying spears. I saw their head dresses, not as elaborate as the North Americans. I recall how small they were, as I am not very tall myself. They had war paint on their faces.

One came and knelt down beside me on my right side. He held his hands over me palms down, like he was warming his hands in front of a fire. His hands began to hover over my body and I turned in mid air as the same was done to the back of me. He was singing all the time.

A South American Shaman appeared and he was a huge, strong, powerful man. He looked down at me and smiled.

As I lay on my mat snakes appeared and began to entwine themselves first round my arms, then my legs and finally my body. I could feel them slithering all over me, such bright colours they were. I did not feel scared at all, just very content.

Our Shaman was doing a healing ceremony on one of the ladies in our group and his singing compelled me to get up and listen. As he was chanting, little red lights danced on the empty mat next to me and directly behind the Shaman. It was not the reflection of the fire, these lights were small, round and twinkling all over the mat.

Once again, I staggered down to the cabana by the beach for a drink and some food. My friend who had advised we go through the swirling hole came walking down shortly after. I noticed that he had a monkey clinging to his back. It was a little one with a cute face and a bushy tail. I opened my mouth to say '(His name) you've got a ......" but my voice vanished and I could not speak. I decided not to say it again, but save it for a later time as I was obviously not meant to say anything in the first place.

After this journey I started to question why this time had been so different. There had been people who did not want to drink for their own reasons, some only drank a little, others did not seem enthusiastic at all. If you were to ask about their journeys, the usual response was 'It was OK' or 'Yeh, I saw some stuff' but that was as far as it went. It was like no-one wanted to talk about it or share and there was none of the usual anticipation to drink again after each ceremony.

So I asked myself more questions ....

Are we being distracted from the plant and her powers by some unknown force who thinks we have seen too much?
Are we being challenged to see how easy it is to send us back into the dumbed down world?
Is the plant testing us to see how easily we are distracted from her?
Have we just been taking halucogenic drugs or was what we have seen, learned and heard really knowledge that there is more than this 5 sense world?

Have we just been playing silly buggers?

I do not know the answer to my own questions, what I do know is we have all embarked on these journeys, and I cannot help but feel that the throwing together of our tribe was done for a reason. One we do not know about just yet.

Brazil 2008 - Lessons to be learned

I was given another chance to go to the Heart Of The Initiate Workshop in Brazil in September. There were to be three Ayahuasca Ceremonies in the week I was there.

I managed two....

Before I actually went to this workshop this time I was having dreams that I was in for a bit of a rough ride. All my last journeys had been so gentle and it seemed I was getting a message of, "Right lady, I have been very gentle with you so far, now is the time for you to see for yourself who you really are"

Read on .........

My First Journey - Snakes & Demons

My first journey began with a feeling of fear and panic. I was confronted by various demons of various colours and horrible faces holding snakes of all shapes and sizes. One decided to put a blue snake up my right nostril which then ran amok in my head, and I felt every squiggle. All this time I was struggling to breathe and decided that this was what it must feel like to die. With a pounding heart I decided not to call the Shaman as I thought it was best that I see what I was meant to see.

The Shaman arrived as The Jaguar, he jumped right into my journey, looked at me and faded away. Such a beautiful animal.

I had no need to call the Shaman as my next vision was one of seeing him in a beautiful place with trees, flowers, grass and rivers. He was sitting cross legged on the grass playing his drums. He began to shift all over the place like he was in a square television screen. It was like he was moving between dimensions. Sometimes he was near to my face, others he was far away. At one point he was so small I could not see him and then he disappeared and it was pitch black, and the music stopped. It went deathly silent.

I was getting very panicky now in the darkness as I was blind, deaf and speechless. I was waving my arms around trying to cry out for help, thinking "Where was the music?" I knew I had to go to the music for help. A bright avenue of trees opened up and I ran down it, past the trees and it was all bright and I could hear the music again. I felt so relieved, I started to cry.

I was transported back in time to some medieval castle walls where I saw military guards carrying machine guns. They had reptilian heads and I was told by the whispering lady that they control everything and they have been around for a very long time. I saw an ancient prison with dungeons, and they were walking up and down in it. I heard the clanking doors behind me as I walked through

I heard the lady singing and she whispered my name into my left ear. Her voice was lovely and she made me feel very safe. She picked me up in her arms and I felt really loved. In my other ear was the singing of a Shaman, and not the one that was with us, with a very deep voice. He was singing the familiar "Way-ay-ay-ay" I had first heard him before in Colombia. I don't know who he is, but he seems to like singing to me.

The lady placed me into a bright yellow swirling tunnel and gently pushed me away from her. I saw myself disappearing towards the end. I was actually waving to myself as I did so and emerged on the Giza plateau in Egypt. I was standing by the Pyramids and the Sphinx.

I was laying on my back with my eyes open staring at the roof when I saw my husband past me and walk over to one of the group and he had a blue shiny bottle in his left hand with a hexagon base. I looked to my left and my husband was still lying on his mat fast asleep journeying with his back to me. I looked again to where I had first seen the other person he went to, and he was not there! Then another man in our group suddenly stood up staring at the empty mat and he was in the position we do when being covered in incense before a ceremony, arms out stretched and legs slightly apart. A bright white light was all around him and I was struggling to cope with the brightness of it all.

One of the ladies from our group appeared and I saw just her face and she said she knew that I hardly ever recycle as I am lazy, but she began to wave her finger at me and said that I must do it from now on as we are damaging the planet. I was a bit startled to see her, but just listened and took it on board anyway, feeling a little bit guilty as she was spot on!

My journey finished with overwhelming peace and tranquillity, albeit I was exhausted by the fear and panic I had witnessed, I was feeling lucky to be alive and that somehow I had been given another chance.

I did not purge all night and the day after was in a bit of a state of shock due to the demons and snakes I had seen the night before. I was a bit depressed all day and kept crying and I kept thinking about what all I had been shown actually meant and why did the lady put me through such hell.

My Second Journey - Out with the old, in with the new...

My second journey was in the day time and I settled down on my mat to await what was to be. It started off with a feeling of dizziness, followed by me walking into a dark room where a person was sitting on a black wall. This person was all red and had their back to me, head in hands. A trusting, sweet lady's voice said, "Come in little girl, I will show you something." I replied, "What do you want to show me?" Then this person turned round and shouted in an angry voice which sounded very deep, gruff and manly ... "THE DEVIL!!" He turned his head and grinned at me with very large teeth, horns and a huge red face and I was absolutely terrified. He was laughing at me!

I was so scared I ran off into another room and was immediately thrown to the ground. I was on all fours with my head in my hands curled up as I was beaten with canes and kicked all over the place. I felt so much pain and was told that this was all the pain I had ever caused others in my life and now I had to feel what it was like. I crawled off on all fours into a dark tunnel in pain, panicking like hell and struggling to breathe.

I opened my eyes and I was up on all fours on my mat thinking that this was the end of me. My heart was pounding in my chest and I still could not breathe. It felt like a panic attack, and I really thought I was going to die.

I turned round to see the Shaman attending to a lady who needed him across the room. I knew I was on my own, and had to ride this storm as someone needed him more than me. I must have been making noises as the Shaman's wife suddenly jumped up, faced towards me and started to rattle instruments. She was smiling and looked so bright in her yellow dress, she soothed me back to sleep.

I was now standing in another dark room. Suddenly bright orange demonic faces appeared out of the darkness towards my face. I asked who they were and one by one they told me who they were. One was my vanity, my greed, my jealousy, my envy, my stupidity and so on. As soon as they had told me who they were they moved aside to let the other introduce themselves. I was told I could go with them now or turn around and walk out of the door.

I walked out of the door and cried my heart out, feeling a worthless piece of rag.

I saw my brain transparent in my skull in front of me, and it turned bright red and orange. It then started to grow and my own head felt so hot and I felt it explode which was painful, but all the time this was happening I kept getting a message that room was being created for more information and to let it all go. A grey gremlin type alien was working with a tool in each hand on top of my skull, which I could still see in front of me. My brain had returned to normal and he was laughing in this really silly laugh. I in return started to laugh and asked what he was doing. He said through his laughter, I am putting back your sense of humour!

The Shaman jumped into my journey again as the Jaguar and he was looking at me. He then started to gently rotate in front of me.

A wave of absolute peace came over me and I saw a lady's face appear but she kept changing. Each face was so beautiful and I told her so. The last face was the one of the resident masseuse who practices Reiki and she was smiling at me saying, "Susie, do not be afraid" I was so happy to see her.

I floated to a beautiful place by the lady holding my hand where I could see all the universe, stars and the moon. I asked to see my mother from this lady and then I was sat down on a bench under a tree holding hands with a woman with long blonde curly hair and bright blue eyes. I said she was not my mother as my mother had dark hair, eyes and skin. She replied that she was, as this is what she now looks like in the other dimension. She pointed to the stars and told me that my grandfather was in that direction and she pointed to another area and said that was where my step-grandmother was. She told me that we may not be together in the other dimensions and that I had to tell the group to redeem themselves now as it depends on what we are like in this world.

Incidently, my step grandmother was quite a nasty person when she was in this world, so it was not surprising that she was not with my grandfather.

She told me that my husband, children and myself were going to live a long time. Then she showed me faces of my husband and she told me a message for him. She told me a message for a friend and then I was transported back to medieval times and I actually saw Henry the Eighth with really red hair! I was on top of his castle wall looking down on the people below, a bit like a scene out of the film 'Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves' except the reptilians were still around, in the castle, walking round the walls and the lady was telling me things all the time. She left after her last message for a dear friend who was not with us. I did get the shock of my life when I opened my eyes to see his son next to me though! The mat next to me was empty as his son was on a mat in another place when I first entered my journey, so how long he had been there I do not know.

After she had gone, four Native Indian chiefs appeared from the four directions with their faces covered with one arm and their other arms across their backs. I saw the coloured feathers on their heads and their headress beads were the same pattern as my beaded bracelet. They lined up in front of me and I asked who they were. One replied that they could be who I wanted them to be. Did I want them to be my teachers and listen to them or to my own stupidity? I felt like I was a little girl being told off, so I just listened.

They told me to stop worrying like I do all the time, they told me that I have been given another chance and my pain has now gone. They told me that the earth, stars, universe belongs to us all. They told me to appreciate the joy of having a new life now and that I must stop crying for my mother and feeling sorry for myself due to the childhood I had. The past is gone and I must live for the future.

They told me I was a special person. As all this was going on I felt like I was not worthy to be told all this or visited by these people. They also told me that our Shaman was very tired and that I had no need to have any healing from him as they had healed me and I was free. They said that because I had opened my heart to them they accepted me. They told me to go now and live with my new peace.

After they had left my vision, the whole place turned into an Indian camp. I saw people of all ages, children, dogs, fires, wigwams etc. I knew the four grandfathers were still there as I could feel them and the whole place was filled with this wonderful energy. I could feel the spirits all around.

When I woke my beaded bracelet which had been tied four times was hanging loose by one single tie. I slipped it onto my right hand and as I did so I felt a bolt of something like electricity run up my left arm and saw red sparks crackle from the bracelet. Also there was a small fresh clean cut on the underside of my left thumb, like a perfectly straight paper cut. I do not know how it got there as I had not walked about all night.

I still did not purge that night, and the day after I felt so glad to be alive!

My Third Journey (Not!)

I was all ready for my last journey, laying on my mat waiting for the others to arrive. I suddenly got a strange feeling that there was a bit of bad energy floating around the place I was in, yet it was nothing to do with the few people who were in there at the time. I felt really depressed and it was as if the atmosphere had gone flat. I could sense something was wrong, but was not sure what it was. I felt an emptiness around the place and had a feeling that there were some entities in the place with us that were not nice. It felt like I was part of a circular chain and the chain had been broken.

My husband arrived and told me that he was still not able to go through another ceremony and something made me jump up, collect my things and swiftly vacate the place.

My husband had been having messages all day telling him he was not to drink that night as it was not right. He had agreed to turn up and drink just a little so he could be there for me, just enough to "put him under"

We went back to our bungalow and talked. He said that a few of our tribe had gone out into the town and we decided to try to find them. Once we did, it was like a wave of warm energy blew towards me on seeing them. One asked why I was looking so down and I replied that I did not think I was looking like that. However, once he had said that the "chain being broken" feeling came again, but quickly passed.

* * * *

During the workshop we took part in a North American Indian Lakota tobacco tying tradition where you put tobacco and an intention into different coloured pieces of cloth and tie them in a row on a string in a certain order.

I was sitting on a mat with a person on either side of me, and I don't know why, but I had to go outside as I began to feel dizzy, my ears could hear a high pitched hum and my hands started shaking before we started and I had to go outside. I was physically sick in a bush.

Why this was so I do not know, but I have learned that the plant has given me a form of sensitivity which I cannot explain. Maybe she has given me a gift.

On the way off the plane from Sao Paulo to London Heathrow I was approached by a Customs Official as soon as I had put one foot on English soil. As he was asking me various questions he looked into my eyes and I purposely maintained direct eye contact with him. His eyes pierced into mine. He bent down with his head on one side till his face was a couple of inches off mine and it was like he was reading me. So I read him. He had very dark eyes and I saw the evil in them. I was not afraid but I saw right through into his soul. I was a bit miffed not only that he had singled me out of the group whilst I was in a great hurry to catch my next plane, but also because I was sad that there are people on this planet who take joy in trying to intimidate others with such black hearts.

After I had collected my luggage we ran to the train to the next terminal. If we had not passed a lady from our tribe who raised her hand at us waving as we ran along, I would not have noticed that this very same man had been watching us from a short distance. He looked at me directly again with his arms folded and again I noticed his eyes.

I smiled sweetly to his face, wondering if I had, at last, come face to face with a reptilian .....

Colombia 2008

I also drank Ayahuasca at the end of February 2008 and this time was in Colombia. There were six of us, as well as the Shaman and his two assistants.

Again this was organised by a wonderful man who is so kind, and the Heart of the Initiate team.

We stayed with a nice family who had a lovely old Chow dog called Gonzo; the relevance to his mentioning will become clearer later.

The ceremonies took place in the on site maloca which was a very peaceful place but with very strong energy vibes as I found out later. We also took part in two Inipi sweat lodge ceremonies.

This is a true account of my experiences

The First Journey - The Magical Maloca

When I drank Aya in Brazil, I asked many questions of the plant. Some of the answers I got straight away, others months later. This time I decided to allow the Goddess to show me what she thought I needed to know. The Aya medicine was mixed in a way as to be like treacle. So you had to take it from a spoon, put it in your mouth then swallow the ball of goo in one gulp. Then after you had mastered that, you had to lick the spoon clean. This left you with sticky lips and black teeth! Some of the group cheated with toothpaste tucked away to rub on their teeth to take the taste away as well as tiny sweets to do the same (You know who you are, you wimps!)

One of our tribe got food poisoning the day of this ceremony, but the Shaman let them join in without drinking as he was fast asleep on his mat feeling very ill.

I drifted off

First I saw three people come walking towards me wearing black plain robes, with black pointed hoods. Then I was shown the circular roof of the maloca but it was not the same as when I entered it, it had wooden carvings all around it and I floated all the way around looking at it all.

Someone picked up my left wrist very gently and looked at the beaded bracelet I was wearing for a while then put my wrist back down on the mat, again really gently. A Shaman appeared with long straight black hair in a pony tail which was tied halfway down his back. He was also wearing white robes and a white hat kneeling next to our friend who was ill. He was fast asleep but I saw this Shaman fanning leaves over him and could see him chanting but there was no sound. It was not the Shaman we had sitting in the maloca

Gonzo the Chow dog then appeared beside me, and turned into a white wolf with bright blue eyes so I began to stroke him and he was happy, telling me he was once as I see him now. He also told me to take his senses and see how he sees the world for a while.

Then he ran off into the woods and as he did a white horse ran out from the trees galloping very fast right past me.

A massive glass pyramid was the next vision with light behind it so that all the colours of the rainbow shone through it. I saw my husband walk towards this pyramid and he was looking up at it as he did so. He disappeared and a black silhouette appeared inside it, but I could not see who it was. Then I got the message that 2012 was coming.

Every flag of every country of the world appeared before my eyes in a circular motion and I saw them all as if I was in some sort of arena. Hordes of people came walking past me, looking at me. Some were normal looking but with others their faces changed so that they had snake eyes and crocodile teeth. They were followed by hordes of soldiers in military gear carrying machine guns; they wore black berets with camouflage gear and big black boots.

Visions of severed heads I saw, some with hatchets in them, women and men of all races and cultures, with blood running down their faces. I saw mutilated children and babies in plastic bags struggling to breathe. The message I got was that we are being controlled and that life is precious and we should not butcher and kill each other. Whether this was the wolves that were ever present by my side telling me or something else I do not know.

The last things I saw were four black snakes with the eyes of a big cat along with bees on a tree branch working together. Then that pyramid came again with a bright blue eye above it with light all around.

The image of that pyramid was in my eyes long after my journey was over, even whilst I was back in my lodge dozing off to sleep, and it was still there the morning after I had slept.